Check Me Out

Every once in a while. Someone checks me out, makes an eye for me, looks up and down– they look good, I look back, I don’t know if this is me interpreting their look. Or simply that I stick out every once in while. I mean this phenomenon mostly happens when I’m dressed to go out or dressed to stand out, my edges are no longer rough and I want to get noticed. So people notice me. It’s a strange little phenomenon. I’ve underdressed drastically so I don’t stick out actually.

Sometimes the guys look. This happened on the train a while ago. Actually, when I was reading a book and was deeply engrossed in it. I didn’t make any eye contact what so ever. He spit at me as he left the train. Almost hit my face and said “damn fagots” as he left.

Just recently a guy was showing of his behind (I don’t know why I’ve been encountering men like this recently) I took a quick peak; he started licking his lips in a sultry fashion. As he stepped off the train and as the doors closed as the train pulled out of the station. He flipped me off and screamed and cursed at me for being gay.

A long time ago, I’ll never forget this moment. A man rode across the car from me. He rose and a gun slipped out and thud on the floor of the subway car. I didn’t startle. I have too much New York experience to startle. I looked around and all was safe. The man quickly scooped up the gun and hunched over, he picked it up like he was scooping up a lost wallet. No one seemed to notice, yet a soft quiet descended on the people around me. A few minutes passed. About a minute actually I got up and moved away. Never showing emotion on my face or the true reason for my move, others followed to safety, some got off the car all together. Two stops away I left the train. Went about my day as though nothing happened.

These odd little moments have made up my New York experience and nothing phases me.

Comments

[Charlie]

I've never been called a faggot, only when I was younger, and people didn't realize I was actually a faggot -- not so funny. Hmmm, but yeah since coming out and living in Victoria, I have had no such luck. With my Irish upbringing and Newfoundland Street smarts, I actually welcome it. I want to be called faggot, so I can pound the shit out of dude saying it to me.

I have pushed people’s boundaries, and ventured into the straight, drunken world after 2 in the morning, looking for it, announcing "I'm gay!", but most people aren't interested or they back down too easily: cowards! Are they afraid? I don't know.

There was one night when a 6 foot 1, drunken Irish man made a nasty comment to me. I was walking home with my friend Jacob, and after hearing the comment about taking a wiener up the ass -- because I wouldn't buy a hot dog off of his friend, I turn and ask him to say it to my face.

Now, I'm a muscular guy, but he is way taller and bigger than me. My friend Jacob is two blocks away after I challenge him -- I see him in the distance stumbling past the next stop light -- and finally, the dude bites. Regardless, moral of the story: don't call 6 foot 1, drunken Irish guys, they are always right.

I spent the remainder of the night, finding common ground with him -- we turned out to be pals, but he was ready to rip my head off. We we're joking and my arm was around his waist as we talk about being irish, and how rough we are! lol, sucker! A faggot was carassing his hip.

See, I'm all talk in these cases, and no action if the guy can easily take me. I want a fair fight!!!

[eric a]

lol... i was at a bar one night in college and a drunk football player asked me -WHILE I WAS AT THE URINAL IN THE BATHROOM no less - "do you take it up the ass?" well, i told him "yeah, i'm gay." then zipped up, and cornered him, "what of it?" i was very into bodybuilding at the time and very large, but he was a football player and trained for strength. he could have squashed me! instead, though, he became like an apologetic puppy, saying his friend had put him up to it. he spent the rest of the year saying he was sorry whenever we ran into each other on campus.

[Persian Guy]

I would check you out if I saw you, but I am subtle and you might not notice :)